Friday, March 25, 2011

The Tug at Your Heart

Have you ever felt a pull at your heart that's so deep, it cant be explained?

Have you ever felt like someone or something is so deep in your heart that you can feel their soul in you?

I HAVE...

I have felt a tug at my heart which is so deep and so strong and so powerful, that I know it has to be my girls sending their love to me...telling me hello....saying "Mommy we love you". 

My eyes fill with tears but not always sad tears. I have always felt that when a person, passed away they we're gone in every way, shape, and form.  But now, I know I was wrong....even though our loved ones are no longer in our presence, they are in us.

The first time I felt this feeling, I was so scared that I was going crazy...that I had fallen so deep into my grief that I was losing my mind.  I felt like Tiffany (aka Tiffy) was here with me....I felt like she could have been in my arms, in my home, and in our lives physically.  I told my DH with tears in my eyes, I feel Tiffany, shes calling for me, she missing me, she loves me. He didn't quite understand and was a bit confused, but he could easily see that I was serious and that I was truly feeling my child.

Sometimes, I feel Elizabeth (aka Lizy Pooh) as well.  She comes on just as strong as Tify.  Then there are times I feel both the girls in such a joyful way, like they are playing....what a smile this brings to my face.

I hope none of you feel that I am crazy, I just think its the love I have for them and the love they have for me. Its difficult to explain the feeling you get when you know that your loved one is still with you

It funny how things go back and forth on this journey called grief.

2 comments:

  1. I often feel that way too.... {hugs}

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  2. I am sure God knew you needed to be embraced with love from your girls...I don't think you are crazy at all!! I remember seeing pics of your girls. I love the pics on this blog and especially the adorable outfit you had for Elizabeth.

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