Saturday, December 31, 2011

14 weeks 4 days

Well its New Years Eve.....the time we try to strive for new goals and dreams and the time we reflect on the past year.

As I look over the year some things we're good, some things I could have done better, and some things I am still working on.  Even though all of my goals have not been reached they are being worked on.....one in particular is being a mom.  I remember saying to my DH last year that I wanted to work on several items by the end of the year...1.  work on paying off bills 2. refinance the house 3. prepare for our own child to come into our home or adopt.

Even though I lost my teaching job in June (due to budget cuts) I have managed to pay off one of my many credit card bills and my car :)  The two bills together save us over $500 a month (WOW).  Refinancing the house is harder than I thought since we are now a one income family.  As of Dec 31, 2011 I am 14 weeks and 4 days, so I am preparing to bring our own biological child home.

Even though the weeks have been difficult, I am here.  I have made it through the first trimester!!!!  Every day I work to stay positive and not let fear take over .  I would be lying if I said I wasnt scared, if I havent cried, if I havent felt like I was losing my mind. 

I am praying that 2012 brings me my earthly baby...home, safely, and healthy

Monday, December 19, 2011

12 weeks 4 days

I am so ready to get past the first trimester....

It has been an emotional rollacoster, but then I wonder if the second trimester will be any different.  I wish I could have a normal pregnancy.  So many worries, so many tears, so much loss has trully put a "damper" on the "pregnancy bliss".

Is it just me.....

I have not openly announced that I was pregnant.  People and family have found out through my sickness and my belly...lol.  I have told a couple of people openly but I didnt scream it from the roof tops.  My brother told his wife, "I think Ton Ton is pregnant".  She replied, yea, I think so as well and when she is ready to tell us she will in her own time.  I dont think I ever said I was but i just slid it into conversation. 

Since it has been cold wearing my coat hides my stomach from most.  Two ladies at church just noticed my bump and we're very suprised.   They wanted to know if they had missed the annoucement.