Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Holiday Blues II

Oh my goodness...

I miss my girls so much right now and it hurts so much!!!!

I am screaming on the inside, I am crying on the outside and no one can "fully" understand my pain.  My heart hurts so much..... its full of so much love for my girls and they are not here for me to love, kiss, and spoil. 

All DH and I have ever wanted was one....ONE....and after all of our losses I still ask myself:  WHY.....IF NOT NOW, THEN WHEN.....

It seems that the people who don't want their babies are the ones who get pregnant over and over again.  It also seems as though some people can blink and get pregnant.  It seems as if the people who want a baby and can provide for a baby are the ones which struggle the most. 

I am sorry, but I find this my place to vent and I am hurting so right now in this grief journey

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